The Big Bob-Blog

2006-05-03

It's all Brad's show now.

I consider Luann a webcomic: because my local paper doesn't carry it, I read it online. That said, I find the saga of Brad DeGrootto be the second most interesting ongoing story currently on the American newspaper comics page, next to B.D.'s therapy over in Doonesbury.

Brad, chubby and chronically lazy older brother of Luann herself, embarked on a path to become a firefighter after graduating from high school. Along the way, he met Toni Daytona, a beautiful girl who shares his passions for firefighting, fast cars, dirty jokes, and Oreos (this last despite having a figure of flawless dimensions. In the world of Luann, this is all totally plausible). Unfortunately, Toni was involved with Dirk, who epitomizes the violent cro-magnon 'jerk boyfriend' archetype, emotionally abusive to Toni and physically intimidating to Brad. He went so far as to beat Brad up after Brad and Toni graduated from fire academy together. Brad slapped Dirk with a restraining order, and Toni insisted she was done with Dirk... a year ago. Since then, Dirk keeps coming around, 'coincidentally' wherever Brad and Toni might be. Dirk emotionally blackmails Brad to keep Brad from calling the cops on him for violation of the restraining order, claiming that it would devastate Toni if Brad did so. Toni's all but verified this claim, and since Brad still holds out hope of making it with her, he hasn't busted Dirk.

Until now.

Last Thursday, Brad walked in on Toni and Dirk fixing Reddy, the robot fire truck (Brad and Toni's assignment is to go around to schools giving fire-safety talks to the kids- Brad speaks through and operates Reddy from backstage, while Toni stands on stage being eye candy). Finally reaching an appropriate level of frustration over this musclebound psychotic's refusal to obey the court's orders and, more importantly, over his crush's refusal to return his affections rather than continue to make eyes at said musclebound psychotic, Brad dialed the cops. Dirk smashed the phone to the floor. Brad had anticipated that, and had borrowed Dirk's phone to make the call.

Go Brad! Whoo!

Then, Toni had the nerve to question Brad's sanity, as though he was the one going around acting like the Credible Hulk. So Brad told her they were over. Whoo! Good move, Brad- she may be hot, but she is not worth the baggage.

I'm so very psyched to see where it goes from here. Now, if you'll excuse me, the conclusion to last night's House is on, and I'm kind of hoping that jerk Foreman croaks.

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